








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 812 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 936 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 82 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6248 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,621 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6086 | 20% |
| Smokes | 11658 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 6709 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 6168 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,330,534 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 707 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MAU | 49% | 51 |
| #2 | 女王 Hakari | 42% | 169 |
| #3 | Mr Flickzy | 38% | 261 |
| #4 | mello_sparkie | 36% | 50 |
| #5 | Joe-007 | 35% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Mr Flickzy | 38% | 261 |
| #4 | mello_sparkie | 36% | 50 |
| #5 | Joe-007 | 35% | 63 |
| #6 | *!Shadow_Wolf!* | 32% | 53 |
| #7 | EMPRESS LOLLA | 30% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr Flickzy | 22 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | 女王 Hakari | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | EMPRESS LOLLA | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | MAU | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | *!Shadow_Wolf!* | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr Flickzy | 623 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #2 | 女王 Hakari | 477 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #3 | *!Shadow_Wolf!* | 89 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | mello_sparkie | 85 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Joe-007 | 56 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr Flickzy | +2.76 | 58 | 54 |
| #2 | MAU | +1.12 | 53 | 39 |
| #3 | EMPRESS LOLLA | -0.14 | 44 | 23 |
| #4 | NannyMcFee | -1.14 | 14 | 55 |
| #5 | *!Shadow_Wolf!* | -1.56 | 46 | 44 |





