








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 41 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1195 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,689 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 541 | 20% |
| Smokes | 831 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 523 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 794 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $162,452 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Get Racc'd | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | Gratisfaction | 100% | 8 |
| #3 | PadoruR | 89% | 19 |
| #4 | Addy -Y- | 74% | 35 |
| #5 | BRACE | 67% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Addy -Y- | 74% | 35 |
| #5 | BRACE | 67% | 12 |
| #6 | St3rl1ng | 61% | 31 |
| #7 | malta | 60% | 5 |
| #8 | damyo | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Addy -Y- | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | St3rl1ng | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | PadoruR | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Addy -Y- | 170 | 0.26 | 5 min |
| #2 | St3rl1ng | 113 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | BRACE | 74 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| #4 | Gratisfaction | 56 | 0.31 | 2 min |
| #5 | PadoruR | 50 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Addy -Y- | +4.68 | 95 | 75 |
| #2 | hazr | +3.93 | 92 | 70 |
| #3 | St3rl1ng | +3.09 | 98 | 63 |
| #4 | Gratisfaction | +2.91 | 85 | 72 |
| #5 | malta | +1.63 | 93 | 77 |





