








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 846 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 258 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 59 matches | ||
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3876 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,907 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3061 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1941 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 5022 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 2883 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,322,702 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 262 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Karma | 60% | 131 |
| #2 | Sushi ♥ | 56% | 70 |
| #3 | Lassaad | 54% | 272 |
| #4 | NVMELESSKING777 | 52% | 253 |
| #5 | squiou | 51% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lassaad | 1196 | 0.21 | 32 min |
| #2 | NVMELESSKING777 | 745 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #3 | Karma | 463 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #4 | Sushi ♥ | 267 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #5 | squiou | 116 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chmaqo | +2.01 | 79 | 66 |
| #2 | Sushi ♥ | +1.98 | 78 | 58 |
| #3 | Karma | +1.61 | 84 | 63 |
| #4 | Lassaad | +0.94 | 83 | 67 |
| #5 | NVMELESSKING777 | -1.44 | 79 | 56 |





