








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 195 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
895 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,300 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 767 | 33% |
| Smokes | 390 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 652 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 491 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $149,968 of utility $93 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sorrow | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | Antik191 | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | ++++++ | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | RoRi | 65% | 17 |
| #5 | oney <(^^,)> | 64% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | sway | 57% | 7 |
| #11 | novian. | 50% | 4 |
| #12 | Depress0 | 50% | 16 |
| #13 | <5m0k3> | 45% | 44 |
| #14 | Dick Chungus | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CSKO.NET TICHO™ | 7 | 0.0095 |
| #2 | <5m0k3> | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | oney <(^^,)> | 3 | 0.0136 |
| #4 | Mr. Mime | 2 | 0.0110 |
| #5 | Dick Chungus | 2 | 0.0202 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CSKO.NET TICHO™ | 78 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #2 | <5m0k3> | 52 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | sway | 37 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #4 | RoRi | 22 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | novian. | 12 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Mime | +2.84 | 86 | 45 |
| #2 | Dellon | +2.57 | 80 | 53 |
| #3 | novian. | +2.27 | 64 | 69 |
| #4 | sorrow | +1.91 | 89 | 64 |
| #5 | CSKO.NET TICHO™ | +1.48 | 68 | 70 |





