








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 77 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 122 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1008 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,037 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 672 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1199 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1192 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 974 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $607,193 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 38 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramilade | 59% | 29 |
| #2 | knaldfis | 50% | 20 |
| #3 | async | 47% | 114 |
| #4 | pant | 46% | 28 |
| #5 | DingoBanana | 46% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | ✪ Toffifeen | 44% | 18 |
| #7 | WouFFeR | 44% | 27 |
| #8 | tehturner | 41% | 91 |
| #9 | awP1vert | 34% | 121 |
| #10 | Herget | 33% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | async | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | DingoBanana | 4 | 0.0142 |
| #3 | Ramilade | 3 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | awP1vert | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | WouFFeR | 2 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | awP1vert | 417 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #2 | tehturner | 156 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | async | 144 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | pant | 120 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #5 | Herget | 36 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ramilade | +5.55 | 92 | 66 |
| #2 | DingoBanana | +4.57 | 80 | 68 |
| #3 | async | +4.03 | 92 | 62 |
| #4 | tehturner | -0.43 | 68 | 67 |
| #5 | knaldfis | -1.33 | 45 | 40 |





