








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1270 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 138 matches | ||
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Esplay | 20 matches | 2,247 | |
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3679 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,584 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6072 | 39% |
| Smokes | 3691 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2454 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3367 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $743,241 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 209 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xqus | 65% | 127 |
| #2 | Zixor | 61% | 18 |
| #3 | smiley | 61% | 41 |
| #4 | HaugeN | 59% | 27 |
| #5 | suunD | 59% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smiley | 6 | 0.0072 |
| #2 | ☂️ ✘aiizyツ | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | xqus | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | TheZartex | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Valito | 2 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smiley | +3.61 | 91 | 56 |
| #2 | IMTH0MAS | +2.98 | 85 | 74 |
| #3 | HaugeN | +2.98 | 84 | 55 |
| #4 | xqus | +0.47 | 74 | 76 |
| #5 | TheZartex | +0.07 | 71 | 59 |





