








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 168 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1208 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,428 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 760 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1054 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 839 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 775 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $382,264 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 36 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ₳𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐬 | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | MasterBlasterNL | 57% | 28 |
| #3 | Bazz | 53% | 32 |
| #4 | ₿roccoli buy ₿ITCOIN | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ₳𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐬 | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | MasterBlasterNL | 57% | 28 |
| #3 | Bazz | 53% | 32 |
| #4 | ₿roccoli buy ₿ITCOIN | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ₿roccoli buy ₿ITCOIN | 2 | 0.0062 |
| #2 | Bazz | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | MasterBlasterNL | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | ₳𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐬 | 1 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bazz | 82 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #2 | ₿roccoli buy ₿ITCOIN | 71 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #3 | MasterBlasterNL | 23 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | ₳𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐬 | 9 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kapoler | +1.62 | 72 | 58 |
| #2 | MasterBlasterNL | +1.18 | 71 | 65 |
| #3 | ₿roccoli buy ₿ITCOIN | +1.13 | 61 | 71 |
| #4 | ₳𝐮𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐮𝐬 | +0.98 | 74 | 39 |
| #5 | Bazz | -0.71 | 57 | 64 |





