








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1230 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,683 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 830 | 23% |
| Smokes | 915 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 861 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1077 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $173,674 of utility $83 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Sharkie;D | 56% | 16 |
| #7 | W1LSON_97 | 56% | 16 |
| #8 | ArdyXX | 54% | 35 |
| #9 | Luniiks (Professional Plower) | 54% | 41 |
| #10 | Wings of Redemption | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | backs- | 3 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | W1LSON_97 | 3 | 0.0092 |
| #3 | Luniiks (Professional Plower) | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Wings of Redemption | 1 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | BOBO!!?? | 1 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luniiks (Professional Plower) | 125 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | Wings of Redemption | 77 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #3 | backs- | 74 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | Sharkie;D | 74 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #5 | W1LSON_97 | 48 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RhoODo | +8.43 | 97 | 78 |
| #2 | Descension | +2.09 | 85 | 71 |
| #3 | Sharkie;D | +1.99 | 76 | 76 |
| #4 | backs- | +1.60 | 86 | 74 |
| #5 | Wings of Redemption | +1.52 | 81 | 56 |





