








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 358 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 159 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2715 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,490 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2843 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3156 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2770 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2721 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $393,869 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MACK | 61% | 71 |
| #2 | raiko | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | dn1ex | 59% | 54 |
| #4 | req | 59% | 100 |
| #5 | nrc | 59% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Fly^ | 56% | 55 |
| #8 | REMAKE_- | 56% | 98 |
| #9 | lamciak | 56% | 104 |
| #10 | czito | 56% | 72 |
| #11 | BJM | 51% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | req | 11 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | czito | 5 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | dn1ex | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | nok ツ | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | nrc | 4 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MACK | 297 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| #2 | req | 284 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | lamciak | 272 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | nrc | 248 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #5 | REMAKE_- | 243 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bicik | +2.14 | 70 | 68 |
| #2 | dn1ex | +0.91 | 87 | 58 |
| #3 | nok ツ | +0.83 | 75 | 82 |
| #4 | MACK | +0.64 | 66 | 84 |
| #5 | nrc | +0.40 | 62 | 80 |





