










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 167 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 296 matches | ||
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5454 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,340 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4671 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5149 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4012 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3508 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,361,323 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 63 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | itsraffi | 61% | 56 |
| #2 | Eis.? | 55% | 98 |
| #3 | Môniká ツ | 52% | 350 |
| #4 | 乡 Miko | 51% | 61 |
| #5 | agent 47* | 50% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Eis.? | 55% | 98 |
| #3 | Môniká ツ | 52% | 350 |
| #4 | 乡 Miko | 51% | 61 |
| #5 | agent 47* | 50% | 117 |
| #6 | Sh4d0w | 49% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Môniká ツ | 10 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | agent 47* | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Eis.? | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | 乡 Miko | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | itsraffi | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Môniká ツ | 2264 | 0.30 | 64 min |
| #2 | Eis.? | 440 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #3 | agent 47* | 302 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | itsraffi | 267 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #5 | 乡 Miko | 115 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | itsraffi | +2.48 | 81 | 70 |
| #2 | N'addy | +2.06 | 74 | 69 |
| #3 | Eis.? | -0.23 | 67 | 61 |
| #4 | Môniká ツ | -0.92 | 61 | 77 |
| #5 | 乡 Miko | -1.09 | 59 | 66 |





