








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 488 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 475 matches | ||
| Premier | 153 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8757 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,202 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10067 | 28% |
| Smokes | 8627 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 8286 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 9222 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $964,910 of utility $60 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 749 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Harp | 57% | 81 |
| #4 | MobiuS | 55% | 355 |
| #5 | Shocking | 54% | 141 |
| #6 | Panduh | 49% | 107 |
| #7 | riperoni | 45% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MobiuS | 1948 | 0.25 | 46 min |
| #2 | Thovex | 400 | 0.27 | 9 min |
| #3 | riperoni | 286 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #4 | Harp | 278 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | Shocking | 277 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ʎƃƃᴉԀ | +2.04 | 74 | 68 |
| #2 | Harp | +1.62 | 88 | 64 |
| #3 | MobiuS | +0.73 | 81 | 69 |
| #4 | Shocking | -0.76 | 69 | 63 |
| #5 | riperoni | -0.86 | 75 | 57 |





