








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 235 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1585 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,046 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3056 | 43% |
| Smokes | 1664 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1718 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 608 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $821,458 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 107 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OdenS | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | ✪ klit :PpPpP | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | xlez | 47% | 111 |
| #4 | EggRt | 45% | 128 |
| #5 | MSTF | 44% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | MSTF | 44% | 36 |
| #6 | skk^ | 43% | 100 |
| #7 | Bose | 43% | 14 |
| #8 | Loco | 39% | 23 |
| #9 | IceFrozen | 37% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xlez | 19 | 0.0083 |
| #2 | skk^ | 14 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | Loco | 9 | 0.0192 |
| #4 | EggRt | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | MSTF | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skk^ | 557 | 0.26 | 19 min |
| #2 | EggRt | 326 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | MSTF | 158 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #4 | xlez | 92 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | ✪ klit :PpPpP | 70 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OdenS | +4.15 | 74 | 72 |
| #2 | skk^ | +3.88 | 89 | 83 |
| #3 | MSTF | +2.93 | 69 | 65 |
| #4 | Loco | +2.86 | 83 | 58 |
| #5 | ✪ klit :PpPpP | +1.80 | 71 | 64 |





