








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 284 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1574 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,487 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2135 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1892 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2991 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2469 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $987,796 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 207 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | daily | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | rezo | 68% | 28 |
| #3 | nicozoro | 68% | 37 |
| #4 | TaX | 65% | 20 |
| #5 | dog1ess | 61% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Sunbro-San | 50% | 22 |
| #12 | ♡ | 50% | 28 |
| #13 | oh no! | 46% | 37 |
| #14 | ♡E⭕⃤ | 46% | 57 |
| #15 | ♠︎ årmen ♠ | 31% | 16 |





