








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 841 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 116 matches | 1,554 | |
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2289 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,585 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1361 | 14% |
| Smokes | 3030 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2973 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2221 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,615,545 of utility $256 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 285 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☁ SteveSTARFIGHTER ☁ | 55% | 44 |
| #2 | GTR ♔ ♕ ♚ ♛ ✌ | 53% | 209 |
| #3 | CarlFisk | 49% | 104 |
| #4 | finkel | 47% | 224 |
| #5 | GingerNinja | 47% | 226 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GTR ♔ ♕ ♚ ♛ ✌ | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | finkel | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | CarlFisk | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | GingerNinja | 1 | 0.0002 |
| #5 | cobretti | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GingerNinja | 601 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #2 | GTR ♔ ♕ ♚ ♛ ✌ | 491 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #3 | finkel | 293 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #4 | ☁ SteveSTARFIGHTER ☁ | 154 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | CarlFisk | 77 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GTR ♔ ♕ ♚ ♛ ✌ | +2.91 | 80 | 70 |
| #2 | Fnizzan | +1.80 | 41 | 59 |
| #3 | finkel | +0.70 | 68 | 65 |
| #4 | ☁ SteveSTARFIGHTER ☁ | -0.02 | 38 | 53 |
| #5 | CarlFisk | -1.24 | 21 | 47 |





