








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 456 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 228 matches | ||
| Faceit | 152 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3471 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,141 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4678 | 23% |
| Smokes | 5858 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4318 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5287 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,421,101 of utility $142 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 139 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pespas the Man | 58% | 99 |
| #2 | luss1ng | 55% | 65 |
| #3 | Noj | 55% | 69 |
| #4 | ConfusedWitness | 55% | 184 |
| #5 | Bot Dank | 53% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | martyy | 19 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Noj | 11 | 0.0079 |
| #3 | Pespas the Man | 9 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | w4sted | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | luss1ng | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | martyy | 2209 | 0.27 | 68 min |
| #2 | w4sted | 626 | 0.19 | 18 min |
| #3 | ConfusedWitness | 363 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #4 | Ferracity | 224 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | :i | 209 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | luss1ng | +2.85 | 49 | 75 |
| #2 | Noj | +1.82 | 65 | 55 |
| #3 | W0RKABLE™ | +1.79 | 84 | 52 |
| #4 | w4sted | +1.65 | 80 | 70 |
| #5 | :i | +1.20 | 69 | 53 |





