








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1169 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 612 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5849 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,248 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4608 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1930 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 6526 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 6184 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,130,936 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 88 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Frotchyy | 51% | 127 |
| #2 | QwkFlkz | 50% | 48 |
| #3 | NUBOPOLY | 50% | 307 |
| #4 | K∆Zòótëd | 48% | 130 |
| #5 | ɱɪᴋᴇᴀʀᴏɳɪ | 48% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | NUBOPOLY | 50% | 307 |
| #4 | K∆Zòótëd | 48% | 130 |
| #5 | ɱɪᴋᴇᴀʀᴏɳɪ | 48% | 105 |
| #6 | buck | 44% | 52 |
| #7 | D₳Ɏ₩₳ℓ₭€Ꞧ | 44% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NUBOPOLY | 9 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Frotchyy | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | K∆Zòótëd | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | QwkFlkz | 4 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | D₳Ɏ₩₳ℓ₭€Ꞧ | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K∆Zòótëd | 489 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #2 | NUBOPOLY | 360 | 0.05 | 11 min |
| #3 | Frotchyy | 240 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | ɱɪᴋᴇᴀʀᴏɳɪ | 152 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | buck | 131 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K∆Zòótëd | +3.16 | 88 | 73 |
| #2 | Frotchyy | +0.55 | 62 | 68 |
| #3 | ToeJerry | +0.41 | 66 | 62 |
| #4 | buck | -0.07 | 65 | 60 |
| #5 | QwkFlkz | -0.55 | 46 | 60 |





