








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Faceit | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3425 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,757 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3110 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3381 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3284 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2982 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $582,024 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 76 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s0c | 64% | 112 |
| #2 | Trofast | 61% | 18 |
| #3 | STAN | 60% | 139 |
| #4 | Veldiz💦💦💦 | 54% | 184 |
| #5 | Neon | 53% | 188 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milked͎ | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Veldiz💦💦💦 | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | s0c | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | STAN | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Dragone | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Neon | 947 | 0.23 | 23 min |
| #2 | Veldiz💦💦💦 | 871 | 0.22 | 22 min |
| #3 | s0c | 476 | 0.19 | 14 min |
| #4 | Milked͎ | 411 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #5 | STAN | 353 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s0c | +2.96 | 83 | 76 |
| #2 | Luring1 | +2.90 | 80 | 73 |
| #3 | tRUPR | +0.06 | 64 | 61 |
| #4 | Milked͎ | -0.07 | 80 | 68 |
| #5 | sneaste | -0.21 | 58 | 60 |





