








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 369 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 57 matches | ||
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2653 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,175 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1138 | 36% |
| Smokes | 1085 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 576 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 376 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,102,429 of utility $217 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 598 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xanias | 60% | 25 |
| #2 | kaleesi | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | EckoMonkey | 56% | 121 |
| #4 | null | 49% | 101 |
| #5 | UNIQUEGAM3RTAG | 45% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EckoMonkey | 667 | 0.28 | 19 min |
| #2 | null | 134 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | kaleesi | 103 | 0.34 | 3 min |
| #4 | UNIQUEGAM3RTAG | 70 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | JokerCiti | 45 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kaleesi | +4.65 | 91 | 66 |
| #2 | EckoMonkey | +1.69 | 56 | 71 |
| #3 | Aidan5000 | +1.33 | 69 | 36 |
| #4 | null | -0.13 | 40 | 50 |
| #5 | UNIQUEGAM3RTAG | -0.82 | 29 | 38 |





