








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1203 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,040 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1003 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1124 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 953 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 960 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $202,299 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Boba Fox | 56% | 43 |
| #6 | HusHusH | 55% | 11 |
| #7 | Ban Mirage | 52% | 52 |
| #8 | Kanna-Peche | 52% | 93 |
| #9 | MrBonzei | 48% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kanna-Peche | 9 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Boba Fox | 3 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | MrBonzei | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kanna-Peche | 348 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | Ban Mirage | 169 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | Boba Fox | 136 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | MrBonzei | 51 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | HusHusH | 46 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr.Explex | +2.03 | 75 | 69 |
| #2 | Kanna-Peche | +1.93 | 81 | 64 |
| #3 | e l ı a s | +1.75 | 78 | 84 |
| #4 | Skydotwav | +1.50 | 79 | 64 |
| #5 | HusHusH | +1.40 | 80 | 74 |





