








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1016 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 807 matches | ||
| Wingman | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 111 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6952 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 45,598 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5441 | 12% |
| Smokes | 14247 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 13912 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 11998 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,041,993 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2368 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kentsu | 52% | 100 |
| #2 | -Betzku- | 50% | 94 |
| #3 | jokotai | 48% | 118 |
| #4 | NikGyver | 45% | 60 |
| #5 | Hikiperse | 44% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kentsu | 52% | 100 |
| #2 | -Betzku- | 50% | 94 |
| #3 | jokotai | 48% | 118 |
| #4 | NikGyver | 45% | 60 |
| #5 | Hikiperse | 44% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jokotai | 9 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Hikiperse | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Kentsu | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | -Betzku- | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | NikGyver | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hikiperse | 575 | 0.18 | 15 min |
| #2 | jokotai | 489 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #3 | -Betzku- | 105 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | NikGyver | 46 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kentsu | 41 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -Betzku- | +2.89 | 64 | 49 |
| #2 | Hikiperse | +2.36 | 40 | 67 |
| #3 | jokotai | +1.01 | 46 | 72 |
| #4 | NikGyver | +0.77 | 68 | 49 |
| #5 | Trauski | -1.78 | 20 | 70 |





