








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 111 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1660 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,537 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1449 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1155 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1374 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1559 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $371,617 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sya | 63% | 40 |
| #2 | Rumako | 60% | 70 |
| #3 | bujaka41 SHOTIME OHTANI | 57% | 112 |
| #4 | ChealPayus | 57% | 145 |
| #5 | maVerick | 54% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Rumako | 60% | 70 |
| #3 | bujaka41 SHOTIME OHTANI | 57% | 112 |
| #4 | ChealPayus | 57% | 145 |
| #5 | maVerick | 54% | 54 |
| #6 | MUN1CH | 52% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChealPayus | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | MUN1CH | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | bujaka41 SHOTIME OHTANI | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bujaka41 SHOTIME OHTANI | 1123 | 0.44 | 42 min |
| #2 | ChealPayus | 717 | 0.22 | 18 min |
| #3 | MUN1CH | 257 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #4 | sya | 137 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #5 | maVerick | 112 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChealPayus | +2.06 | 85 | 72 |
| #2 | bujaka41 SHOTIME OHTANI | +1.33 | 87 | 94 |
| #3 | Desole | +1.32 | 73 | 72 |
| #4 | sya | -0.14 | 51 | 67 |
| #5 | Rumako | -0.76 | 69 | 51 |





