








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 136 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1125 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 264 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 51 | 19% |
| Smokes | 116 | 44% |
| HE Grenades | 35 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 62 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $84,273 of utility $20 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | laloutre | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | One punch guy | 58% | 79 |
| #3 | MavericK#3 | 52% | 48 |
| #4 | Nalik | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | laloutre | 65% | 23 |
| #2 | One punch guy | 58% | 79 |
| #3 | MavericK#3 | 52% | 48 |
| #4 | Nalik | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | One punch guy | 5 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | MavericK#3 | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | laloutre | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Nalik | 1 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | One punch guy | 245 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #2 | laloutre | 77 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | MavericK#3 | 32 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | Nalik | 7 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | laloutre | +9.59 | 81 | 72 |
| #2 | Teletobies the 1th | +0.19 | 50 | 8 |
| #3 | MavericK#3 | -0.15 | 45 | 40 |
| #4 | One punch guy | -2.02 | 30 | 58 |
| #5 | Nalik | -2.74 | 17 | 32 |





