








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 76 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 199 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Renown | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2204 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,298 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1661 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1684 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1953 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1000 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $714,605 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Elba dit Prettaboire | 62% | 26 |
| #2 | tree | 62% | 26 |
| #3 | Sleeping Hasbulla | 58% | 24 |
| #4 | F$K | 53% | 85 |
| #5 | AleksiWannaB | 52% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AleksiWannaB | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Elba dit Prettaboire | 3 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Sleeping Hasbulla | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | F$K | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | bean | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tree | +1.91 | 67 | 53 |
| #2 | Elba dit Prettaboire | +0.73 | 59 | 77 |
| #3 | F$K | +0.59 | 72 | 66 |
| #4 | Sleeping Hasbulla | +0.50 | 69 | 68 |
| #5 | flop | +0.30 | 53 | 58 |





