








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 219 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2371 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,251 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2428 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3808 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 3081 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 934 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $779,850 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 271 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Say nothing | 63% | 27 |
| #2 | tREN | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | rEXY | 54% | 179 |
| #4 | MTU | 51% | 79 |
| #5 | cruM | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | MeMph | 49% | 217 |
| #7 | Skandi | 48% | 197 |
| #8 | CyBeRStuD | 45% | 102 |
| #9 | Amateur | 45% | 74 |
| #10 | Jackson | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MTU | 8 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Skandi | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | rEXY | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | CyBeRStuD | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Amateur | 3 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skandi | 708 | 0.17 | 20 min |
| #2 | MeMph | 419 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #3 | rEXY | 359 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #4 | Amateur | 348 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #5 | MTU | 257 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MTU | +1.70 | 83 | 66 |
| #2 | CyBeRStuD | +0.89 | 79 | 70 |
| #3 | rEXY | +0.80 | 69 | 62 |
| #4 | Amateur | +0.64 | 55 | 77 |
| #5 | MeMph | +0.47 | 62 | 68 |





