








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 95 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
932 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,390 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1061 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1063 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 736 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 530 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $859,370 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johun Ludwug Runbrg | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Uncle Ben's | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | spelzu | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Dani | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Merphen | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Uncle Ben's | 208 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | Johun Ludwug Runbrg | 118 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Dani | 92 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | Ana | 67 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Roobertti | 65 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Randy Savage | +4.85 | 80 | 72 |
| #2 | Uncle Ben's | +4.35 | 73 | 72 |
| #3 | Johun Ludwug Runbrg | +3.70 | 57 | 72 |
| #4 | Finnly | +3.62 | 72 | 68 |
| #5 | Thurgo | +3.42 | 51 | 70 |





