








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 141 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 467 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4207 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,860 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4519 | 23% |
| Smokes | 5845 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5336 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4160 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,102,716 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 192 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | valpacino :) | 44% | 75 |
| #16 | Elnour | 44% | 89 |
| #17 | bjoorta | 42% | 55 |
| #18 | yoshi | 41% | 44 |
| #19 | Bolsa | 32% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vaant | 243 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #2 | valpacino :) | 232 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #3 | yoshi | 219 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #4 | J1nX | 188 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | bjoorta | 152 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝕊𝕥𝕖𝕗𝕒𝕟 :) | +3.27 | 81 | 66 |
| #2 | Asgar | +2.60 | 63 | 64 |
| #3 | bjoorta | +1.62 | 53 | 63 |
| #4 | Elnour | +1.46 | 65 | 63 |
| #5 | floral_tribute | +1.23 | 63 | 49 |





