








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 586 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 248 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3639 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,240 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5674 | 35% |
| Smokes | 4143 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3087 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3336 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $614,179 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 649 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BennyBastu | 56% | 27 |
| #2 | Flytande Flax | 53% | 156 |
| #3 | ✪ Bosen | 51% | 232 |
| #4 | jst | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | ChoFlojT | 50% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | jst | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | ChoFlojT | 50% | 100 |
| #6 | emiliano | 47% | 32 |
| #7 | GeXxO^ | 47% | 47 |
| #8 | patrik | 45% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChoFlojT | 7 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | ✪ Bosen | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Flytande Flax | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | GeXxO^ | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | patrik | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Bosen | 580 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #2 | ChoFlojT | 309 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #3 | Flytande Flax | 212 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | patrik | 167 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | GeXxO^ | 166 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GeXxO^ | +2.77 | 92 | 71 |
| #2 | Cayrine/non-binary/femboy | +1.96 | 82 | 78 |
| #3 | emiliano | +1.47 | 88 | 53 |
| #4 | BennyBastu | +1.36 | 86 | 57 |
| #5 | jst | +0.70 | 79 | 40 |





