








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 9 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 179 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2588 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,645 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2251 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1896 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3205 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2293 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $747,066 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [c]0Ld | 74% | 19 |
| #2 | ☯ Roca | 59% | 70 |
| #3 | rKHJ' | 58% | 226 |
| #4 | Martin Hinteregger | 55% | 64 |
| #5 | AzL | 53% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | rKHJ' | 58% | 226 |
| #4 | Martin Hinteregger | 55% | 64 |
| #5 | AzL | 53% | 79 |
| #6 | croCc | 51% | 47 |
| #7 | ✪ uNittZ ´´ | 51% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rKHJ' | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | AzL | 6 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | croCc | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | ☯ Roca | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Martin Hinteregger | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rKHJ' | 569 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #2 | AzL | 253 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #3 | Martin Hinteregger | 202 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | ☯ Roca | 192 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | ✪ uNittZ ´´ | 120 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☯ Roca | +4.19 | 77 | 66 |
| #2 | [c]0Ld | +4.10 | 62 | 89 |
| #3 | AzL | +0.61 | 56 | 64 |
| #4 | Akira Shirase | +0.11 | 66 | 68 |
| #5 | Martin Hinteregger | +0.04 | 44 | 69 |





