








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 90 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
818 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,550 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 624 | 24% |
| Smokes | 969 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 426 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 531 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $672,742 of utility $226 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 369 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wonk | 23 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | lafaa | 23 | 0.0103 |
| #3 | shittinbullets89 | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | Ryan | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | jerry | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wonk | +3.47 | 85 | 67 |
| #2 | lafaa | +2.48 | 84 | 33 |
| #3 | ♠ProfileName♠ | +2.40 | 79 | 63 |
| #4 | jerry | +2.12 | 59 | 61 |
| #5 | shittinbullets89 | +1.24 | 80 | 47 |





