








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 113 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1748 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,059 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1207 | 24% |
| Smokes | 667 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 1626 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1559 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $226,915 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | mds | 51% | 43 |
| #6 | twocakes | 50% | 24 |
| #7 | RAMBOOZLER | 48% | 50 |
| #8 | FaNaaTiC | 47% | 107 |
| #9 | 30 on me finna cop a chicken | 40% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FaNaaTiC | 13 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | RAMBOOZLER | 10 | 0.0094 |
| #3 | twocakes | 8 | 0.0158 |
| #4 | NibNob | 7 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | mds | 7 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FaNaaTiC | 350 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #2 | NibNob | 222 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #3 | mds | 186 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #4 | RAMBOOZLER | 135 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | sublime | 125 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sublime | +1.69 | 77 | 63 |
| #2 | SlappedShot | +1.48 | 69 | 56 |
| #3 | Jamie | +1.39 | 65 | 59 |
| #4 | mds | +0.56 | 72 | 67 |
| #5 | FaNaaTiC | +0.41 | 87 | 53 |





