








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 702 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 465 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 102 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7016 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,069 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5775 | 25% |
| Smokes | 4486 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 7462 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 5346 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,465,155 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 292 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | #bebe | 47% | 101 |
| #8 | Uufunk | 45% | 88 |
| #9 | .# Paettie ..|.. | 43% | 30 |
| #10 | pietze | 43% | 35 |
| #11 | kRIZZy | 42% | 139 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knochentrocken | 10 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | kRIZZy | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Kirby | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | #bebe | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | YilmazGüzelAMK | 3 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knochentrocken | 528 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #2 | Kirby | 472 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | #bebe | 235 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #4 | kRIZZy | 149 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #5 | C H A R L I E L I E L I E L I E | 119 | 0.13 | 3 min |





