








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 571 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 667 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 104 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4338 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,500 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1798 | 16% |
| Smokes | 4202 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 4428 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 1072 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,564,061 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | balalalala | 61% | 38 |
| #2 | brooding in their castle | 55% | 58 |
| #3 | BBFAT | 55% | 58 |
| #4 | 你okay的 | 54% | 37 |
| #5 | Faisal | 54% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #16 | lucida | 42% | 48 |
| #17 | Sleepin.ponyo | 41% | 90 |
| #18 | 猎刚猪 | 41% | 122 |
| #19 | MR MEE6 | 40% | 47 |
| #20 | White Meat𐂃 | 38% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 猎刚猪 | 17 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | brooding in their castle | 17 | 0.0133 |
| #3 | TEMPORALIS | 14 | 0.0114 |
| #4 | Faisal | 12 | 0.0110 |
| #5 | White Meat𐂃 | 11 | 0.0117 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TEMPORALIS | +4.55 | 56 | 79 |
| #2 | 你okay的 | +3.68 | 74 | 57 |
| #3 | Faisal | +2.93 | 56 | 80 |
| #4 | brooding in their castle | +2.81 | 67 | 49 |
| #5 | yuqs | +2.77 | 79 | 68 |





