








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 50 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 388 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2370 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,401 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 322 | 7% |
| Smokes | 1000 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1866 | 42% |
| Molotovs | 1213 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,286,320 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 139 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -YT-Papercrinkly-TTV- | 50% | 60 |
| #2 | Inphinity | 49% | 280 |
| #3 | Moose | 47% | 234 |
| #4 | â•DirtyBubble | 45% | 254 |
| #5 | Captain .38 Special | 42% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Inphinity | 49% | 280 |
| #3 | Moose | 47% | 234 |
| #4 | â•DirtyBubble | 45% | 254 |
| #5 | Captain .38 Special | 42% | 130 |
| #6 | camerontodd02 | 31% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Inphinity | 14 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Moose | 11 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Captain .38 Special | 10 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | â•DirtyBubble | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | -YT-Papercrinkly-TTV- | 4 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moose | 1320 | 0.26 | 32 min |
| #2 | â•DirtyBubble | 349 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #3 | Inphinity | 183 | 0.03 | 4 min |
| #4 | Captain .38 Special | 112 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | -YT-Papercrinkly-TTV- | 69 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -YT-Papercrinkly-TTV- | +2.06 | 67 | 60 |
| #2 | â•DirtyBubble | +1.05 | 68 | 52 |
| #3 | Inphinity | +0.59 | 69 | 52 |
| #4 | eN1gma | -0.22 | 54 | 24 |
| #5 | Moose | -0.88 | 38 | 74 |





