








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 128 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
604 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,339 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 257 | 19% |
| Smokes | 372 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 358 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 352 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $208,921 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gnuut | 2 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | saag | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | war elephantS ☭ | 1 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | J.O.O.P / The Angel | 1 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | saag | 141 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #2 | Gnuut | 58 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | war elephantS ☭ | 58 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | M4nn3 | 49 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | Dumezki | 22 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jöööns MO | +3.79 | 43 | 73 |
| #2 | J.O.O.P / The Angel | +1.78 | 80 | 51 |
| #3 | Vulle | +1.74 | 62 | 55 |
| #4 | saag | +1.66 | 71 | 70 |
| #5 | M4nn3 | +0.68 | 59 | 74 |





