








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 801 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 89 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2467 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,689 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4946 | 39% |
| Smokes | 4095 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 946 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 2702 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $802,331 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 158 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jöfry | 48% | 115 |
| #2 | TM26 | 46% | 285 |
| #3 | Magnix | 44% | 121 |
| #4 | mechanicalmeatballs | 42% | 194 |
| #5 | manu | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jöfry | 48% | 115 |
| #2 | TM26 | 46% | 285 |
| #3 | Magnix | 44% | 121 |
| #4 | mechanicalmeatballs | 42% | 194 |
| #5 | manu | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TM26 | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | mechanicalmeatballs | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Magnix | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | Jöfry | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mechanicalmeatballs | 893 | 0.22 | 22 min |
| #2 | TM26 | 470 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #3 | Jöfry | 448 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #4 | Magnix | 105 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | manu | 7 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YNG \\ SNDWCH | +2.01 | 75 | 66 |
| #2 | TM26 | +1.08 | 54 | 64 |
| #3 | Magnix | -0.93 | 37 | 40 |
| #4 | mechanicalmeatballs | -2.48 | 36 | 54 |
| #5 | manu | -3.92 | 26 | 34 |





