








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 52 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1778 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,581 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1176 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1302 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1930 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1173 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $358,838 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Fuzzy (Doubloon Lover) | 52% | 21 |
| #6 | DragonStyle | 50% | 26 |
| #7 | Mrlawnmowerdeth | 50% | 40 |
| #8 | Antony | 43% | 14 |
| #9 | Mail | 33% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mrlawnmowerdeth | +3.43 | 83 | 74 |
| #2 | Jillie Bean | +2.85 | 83 | 54 |
| #3 | DragonStyle | +1.03 | 80 | 54 |
| #4 | Drakkarn | +0.57 | 64 | 60 |
| #5 | Sharky | -1.13 | 48 | 55 |





