








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 405 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 97 matches | ||
| Faceit | 80 matches | ||
| Esplay | 8 matches | 2,126 | |
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3054 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,279 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3727 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2825 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2347 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2380 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $432,602 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 256 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R0ME | 57% | 190 |
| #2 | criscros | 55% | 101 |
| #3 | Persson | 50% | 32 |
| #4 | kaake | 50% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R0ME | 57% | 190 |
| #2 | criscros | 55% | 101 |
| #3 | Persson | 50% | 32 |
| #4 | kaake | 50% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R0ME | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | criscros | 4 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R0ME | 736 | 0.19 | 18 min |
| #2 | criscros | 307 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | kaake | 117 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Persson | 32 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | orakadpung | +2.13 | 75 | 73 |
| #2 | kaake | -0.08 | 62 | 70 |
| #3 | criscros | -0.51 | 67 | 69 |
| #4 | Persson | -0.59 | 77 | 41 |
| #5 | R0ME | -0.87 | 64 | 60 |





