








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1303 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 520 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 144 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6404 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,180 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4470 | 19% |
| Smokes | 7942 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 5448 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5320 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,333,898 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sAcul シ | 58% | 33 |
| #2 | UnderPressure | 57% | 53 |
| #3 | Flamqoo- | 56% | 36 |
| #4 | ✪K!LLSWITCHⱭ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝ | 55% | 64 |
| #5 | Wuchtel | 55% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fabsy' ☁ | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | ✪K!LLSWITCHⱭ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝ | 4 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Wuchtel | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | sAcul シ | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | kyouden 𐕣 | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪K!LLSWITCHⱭ͞ ̶͞ ̶͞ ﻝ | 236 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | Fabsy' ☁ | 218 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #3 | kyouden 𐕣 | 207 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | Flamqoo- | 155 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | iTaXx' | 129 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NAJA | +2.46 | 79 | 73 |
| #2 | Wuchtel | +1.88 | 68 | 60 |
| #3 | sAcul シ | +0.91 | 63 | 61 |
| #4 | iTaXx' | +0.77 | 75 | 47 |
| #5 | Flamqoo- | -0.41 | 41 | 73 |





