








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 399 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 495 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2892 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,499 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1797 | 12% |
| Smokes | 4284 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5433 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 2985 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $738,780 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 62 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nedello | 50% | 44 |
| #2 | -Jordan- | 48% | 343 |
| #3 | Zygis | 48% | 330 |
| #4 | Mazvis | 47% | 475 |
| #5 | nunenoriu | 44% | 328 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | -Jordan- | 48% | 343 |
| #3 | Zygis | 48% | 330 |
| #4 | Mazvis | 47% | 475 |
| #5 | nunenoriu | 44% | 328 |
| #6 | Memories | 41% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mazvis | 52 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Zygis | 31 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | -Jordan- | 20 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | nunenoriu | 10 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Nedello | 4 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mazvis | 1691 | 0.17 | 45 min |
| #2 | Zygis | 1054 | 0.15 | 27 min |
| #3 | nunenoriu | 825 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #4 | -Jordan- | 601 | 0.08 | 16 min |
| #5 | Memories | 252 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nedello | +2.18 | 76 | 40 |
| #2 | Mazvis | +1.99 | 46 | 73 |
| #3 | Zygis | +0.37 | 33 | 69 |
| #4 | nunenoriu | +0.21 | 39 | 68 |
| #5 | -Jordan- | +0.21 | 51 | 74 |





