








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 702 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 253 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 151 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 114 matches | ||
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 100 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4924 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,036 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5485 | 34% |
| Smokes | 7003 | 44% |
| HE Grenades | 2641 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 907 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,804,974 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 511 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AnAkaSeraph | 45% | 97 |
| #2 | waz | 45% | 331 |
| #3 | Jbird | 42% | 368 |
| #4 | macca | 33% | 193 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AnAkaSeraph | 45% | 97 |
| #2 | waz | 45% | 331 |
| #3 | Jbird | 42% | 368 |
| #4 | macca | 33% | 193 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jbird | 50 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | waz | 29 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | AnAkaSeraph | 8 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | macca | 7 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jbird | 1485 | 0.20 | 35 min |
| #2 | waz | 1184 | 0.18 | 32 min |
| #3 | macca | 315 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #4 | AnAkaSeraph | 236 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | waz | +2.76 | 76 | 68 |
| #2 | Jbird | -0.13 | 65 | 62 |
| #3 | WillynelsoNZ | -0.51 | 48 | 57 |
| #4 | AnAkaSeraph | -1.06 | 43 | 51 |
| #5 | macca | -6.46 | 21 | 51 |





