








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 445 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 379 matches | ||
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 101 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4169 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,566 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5326 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5081 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4484 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4675 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,322,635 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 105 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | DOGFATHER | 52% | 54 |
| #13 | Monnijonni | 51% | 70 |
| #14 | snaze | 51% | 47 |
| #15 | All-Seeing Eye | 50% | 22 |
| #16 | ak1DEak1 | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zefyros | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | matku | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | rAAT0VANKKURi | 2 | 0.0002 |
| #4 | kurwaraider | 1 | 0.0001 |
| #5 | rasane =)) | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rAAT0VANKKURi | 1800 | 0.21 | 55 min |
| #2 | kurwaraider | 1229 | 0.16 | 35 min |
| #3 | Zefyros | 436 | 0.11 | 12 min |
| #4 | juho | 389 | 0.20 | 13 min |
| #5 | matku | 254 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | latsi | +3.61 | 87 | 73 |
| #2 | rasane =)) | +2.65 | 89 | 59 |
| #3 | tenkkub | +1.60 | 76 | 74 |
| #4 | juho | +0.76 | 72 | 79 |
| #5 | rAAT0VANKKURi | +0.64 | 82 | 81 |





