








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 316 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1607 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,112 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1699 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1003 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 2319 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2091 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $480,387 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 196 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Liil Auzzie | 62% | 45 |
| #2 | SMiZE | 55% | 64 |
| #3 | Zapp | 54% | 67 |
| #4 | shade | 53% | 59 |
| #5 | Bruh | 50% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Liil Auzzie | 62% | 45 |
| #2 | SMiZE | 55% | 64 |
| #3 | Zapp | 54% | 67 |
| #4 | shade | 53% | 59 |
| #5 | Bruh | 50% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zapp | 6 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | shade | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Liil Auzzie | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Bruh | 2 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Liil Auzzie | 128 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #2 | Bruh | 88 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #3 | Zapp | 85 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | shade | 65 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | SMiZE | 37 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SMiZE | +0.89 | 43 | 52 |
| #2 | frequenctd | +0.66 | 75 | 60 |
| #3 | Bruh | +0.46 | 44 | 63 |
| #4 | Liil Auzzie | -0.00 | 69 | 66 |
| #5 | Zapp | -0.14 | 45 | 54 |





