








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 57 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
808 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,500 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1407 | 31% |
| Smokes | 982 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1125 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 986 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $208,068 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 164 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | exioN cre0 | 4 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Paladin | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | GabeMi | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Gwazi | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | exioN cre0 | 342 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #2 | Paladin | 139 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | GabeMi | 86 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | CocornƐ.MK | 53 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | Gwazi | 48 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gwazi | +1.44 | 79 | 49 |
| #2 | CocornƐ.MK | +1.32 | 41 | 78 |
| #3 | Paladin | +0.72 | 65 | 69 |
| #4 | GabeMi | -0.04 | 55 | 53 |
| #5 | exioN cre0 | -0.49 | 60 | 68 |





