








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 427 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Esplay | 19 matches | 1,599 | |
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
700 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,883 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1024 | 26% |
| Smokes | 957 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1014 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 888 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $226,276 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 201 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Klinge | 62% | 29 |
| #2 | Saltsyr3K. | 57% | 37 |
| #3 | s | 50% | 6 |
| #4 | dZAGOEV #10 | 43% | 7 |
| #5 | vibZ3t0r1 | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Isaksen | 1 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Klinge | 89 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | s | 50 | 0.39 | 2 min |
| #3 | Saltsyr3K. | 44 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | einern | 25 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | vibZ3t0r1 | 21 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s | +3.81 | 65 | 69 |
| #2 | vibZ3t0r1 | +1.93 | 64 | 77 |
| #3 | dZAGOEV #10 | +1.63 | 60 | 72 |
| #4 | gripo | +0.71 | 52 | 68 |
| #5 | Saltsyr3K. | -0.32 | 45 | 65 |





