








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 358 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2913 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,288 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2358 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2519 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1876 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2535 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $691,143 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Diddy Did It | 89% | 28 |
| #2 | prakM | 88% | 26 |
| #3 | exile,? | 75% | 16 |
| #4 | Vape Queen ❤ | 73% | 22 |
| #5 | Rei | 72% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | NAH | 62% | 132 |
| #10 | Llamas in Pyjamas | 60% | 68 |
| #11 | swing low | 58% | 31 |
| #12 | bryaz | 52% | 23 |
| #13 | towski | 52% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NAH | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | ari | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | minnii | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Rei | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | Diddy Did It | 3 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ari | 385 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| #2 | NAH | 371 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | minnii | 281 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #4 | Diddy Did It | 117 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | towski | 105 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | boygenius | +3.11 | 81 | 70 |
| #2 | exile,? | +3.05 | 92 | 49 |
| #3 | prakM | +2.96 | 79 | 49 |
| #4 | minnii | +2.22 | 82 | 67 |
| #5 | ari | +2.04 | 64 | 64 |





