








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 103 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 148 matches | ||
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2516 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,594 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2920 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2778 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3370 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2526 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $650,983 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 89 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DemiG | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | uulavi | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | Russell Westbrook | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | GVNKKV | 59% | 37 |
| #5 | weku | 58% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | King | 50% | 16 |
| #8 | Mr.Puffington | 46% | 13 |
| #9 | bot_allen | 46% | 26 |
| #10 | [fll.fi] Sähkäri | 46% | 37 |
| #11 | EEMiMBA | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GVNKKV | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | bot_allen | 2 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MentZi | 171 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | GVNKKV | 111 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | EEMiMBA | 107 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #4 | weku | 104 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #5 | King | 72 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | weku | +2.49 | 71 | 85 |
| #2 | GVNKKV | +2.10 | 46 | 76 |
| #3 | EEMiMBA | +1.46 | 73 | 81 |
| #4 | MentZi | +0.62 | 74 | 72 |
| #5 | Russell Westbrook | +0.60 | 71 | 78 |





