








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 934 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 273 matches | ||
| Faceit | 265 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 109 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4884 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,464 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6348 | 25% |
| Smokes | 7556 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5528 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 6032 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,737,538 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jusa | 65% | 48 |
| #2 | KUBRAT | 61% | 49 |
| #3 | GVNKKV | 59% | 61 |
| #4 | Jupe | 57% | 42 |
| #5 | dddXUULIK | 57% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | weku | 9 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Maikkari | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | King | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | ozeD | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Jusa | 4 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | King | 1191 | 0.22 | 31 min |
| #2 | weku | 1029 | 0.20 | 33 min |
| #3 | Maikkari | 711 | 0.20 | 20 min |
| #4 | ozeD | 429 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #5 | Zankie | 356 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KUBRAT | +3.45 | 78 | 75 |
| #2 | Jupe | +2.98 | 83 | 83 |
| #3 | weku | +2.48 | 78 | 83 |
| #4 | ay ay ron | +1.68 | 68 | 73 |
| #5 | GVNKKV | +1.12 | 51 | 73 |





