








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 60 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
555 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,925 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 463 | 24% |
| Smokes | 512 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 488 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 462 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $198,580 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THE KING DEEZY | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | Nostalgia | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | Mogzzyyy | 80% | 5 |
| #4 | G O A T | 75% | 4 |
| #5 | LewB | 75% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cr4igy7esus | 2 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | Randy | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Mogzzyyy | 1 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | G O A T | 1 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Monkeh | 63 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #2 | @FFACTgg | 62 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #3 | cr4igy7esus | 60 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #4 | THE KING DEEZY | 54 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kieu [A] | 53 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cr4igy7esus | +2.77 | 76 | 86 |
| #2 | @FFACTgg | +2.27 | 79 | 76 |
| #3 | Monkeh | +1.95 | 70 | 56 |
| #4 | Gems | +1.87 | 56 | 64 |
| #5 | BOT_Weasley | +1.62 | 72 | 59 |





