








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 177 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 390 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Renown | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4309 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,149 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2258 | 16% |
| Smokes | 3825 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4994 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 3072 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,362,011 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zundinho | 55% | 44 |
| #2 | Fryfry | 54% | 90 |
| #3 | Bausef | 51% | 37 |
| #4 | KaffeRast | 51% | 149 |
| #5 | S.Koivu | 49% | 207 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S.Koivu | 5 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | foqie ツ | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Spindeln? | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Ack3 | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | frikktion | 3 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KaffeRast | 556 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #2 | S.Koivu | 359 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #3 | Fryfry | 293 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #4 | Spindeln? | 278 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | enback | 248 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zundinho | +2.66 | 91 | 60 |
| #2 | Fryfry | +1.79 | 72 | 77 |
| #3 | 🂡 dRKcmpR 🂡 | +1.76 | 76 | 67 |
| #4 | kURT | +1.62 | 65 | 66 |
| #5 | KaffeRast | +1.58 | 78 | 74 |





