








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 565 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 320 matches | ||
| Faceit | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4612 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,424 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5674 | 28% |
| Smokes | 4200 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 6227 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 4323 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,459,082 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 201 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | szN | 54% | 374 |
| #2 | The B | 54% | 84 |
| #3 | Ottman | 53% | 316 |
| #4 | K@S | 53% | 198 |
| #5 | GnL | 52% | 270 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ottman | 15 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | GnL | 12 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | K@S | 12 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | szN | 11 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | HDH-_- | 6 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GnL | 2002 | 0.35 | 60 min |
| #2 | szN | 1454 | 0.19 | 41 min |
| #3 | Ottman | 1011 | 0.15 | 31 min |
| #4 | K@S | 588 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #5 | HDH-_- | 256 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | szN | +1.37 | 83 | 71 |
| #2 | GnL | +1.17 | 69 | 79 |
| #3 | Ottman | +1.14 | 69 | 75 |
| #4 | The B | -0.11 | 67 | 67 |
| #5 | khrjke | -0.60 | 60 | 74 |





